Wild Nature Heart
Journeys Into Reconnection
Ryan Van Lenning
“The world was made to be free in. Give up all the other worlds except the one to which you belong. Anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.” – David Whyte, Sweet Darkness
“If we surrendered
to earth’s intelligence
we could rise up rooted, like trees.” -Rumi
All Donations Go to Support Wild Nature Heart’s Scholarship Fund
🌲😀We’re excited to announce that Ryan’s new book ‘High-Cooing Through the Seasons: Haiku From the Forest’ has flown the nest and is flying through the world, along with Re-Membering: Poems Of Earth & Soul. Link to Amazon page in bio 🔼
Like unfurling ferns, the haiku in High-Cooing emerged out of the seasons, during the Ryan’s experience living outside over the course of a year among the forests and along the rivers of Northern California. It’s a seasonal record of being embedded in nature in the Nearby Faraway, seventeen syllables at a time. At times pensive, at times whimsical, the small poems included here are like little surprise packages that make you say “Oh!” and then smile with recognition.
Early Praise: “Bless Ryan Van Lenning for listening to the wild voices and bringing back the news for those who have lost their way. Bless him for reminding us of our original love affair with the earth and of what we know deep in our souls. His poems give wise counsel: let go of the debris, remember who you are, do not abandon your luminous thread.” —Lorraine Anderson, editor of Sisters of the Earth and Earth & Eros
#NewRelease #Earthpoetry
National Writing Month DAY 19:
THE TRUTH WANTS TO FORM A SYLLABLE INSIDE
(Word Count: 1210)
I’m stuck down in the canyon—and the truth wants to form a syllable inside me. It whispers my real name.
And I discover: I had abandoned myself. So many times. So many years. And it hurts. Everything hurts too much. Everything is on fire.
I am too thirsty. The fire says, die here or climb. It is not a koan. Die here or climb. I think about what I should write in my journal should they find my body. But I think If I abandon myself now once again, I will abandon everybody I claim to love. And I can’t love without taking myself into the big heart. So I begin.
My body moves up the mountain and I find there’s nothing pulling me up except one thought—I have too much love to lie down here under the big hard sun and give up. The way love finds me comes in the shape of hot desert heart rocks that appear as I climb my way out...hand over fist over hand over fist, claiming my life with everything that is still alive in me.
They are screaming my name with a strength beyond muscle, until I finally reach the rim of the world.
The desert and the mountain and the heart of the world have tattooed the shape of love in me and I know now with a vibrating certainty: I will never abandon myself again. (-Ryan @ryanreturntotheearth)
For #NaNoWriMo2018, we (Katie and Ryan @wildnatureheart) are each writing our memoirs, our Wild Nature Heart stories so-to-speak, sharing a glimpse of our progress throughout November. We really believe what the organization says: the world needs your story! Everyone has a story to tell—What's your Wild Nature Heart? We look forward to sharing this journey of vulnerability and self-discovery.
Ryan and Katie
#mywildnatureheartstory
OUR DEEPEST FEAR
A great reminder from Marianne Williamson. #MondayMotivation
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
National Writing Month DAY 17:
AN APPRENTICESHIP TO VULNERABILITY
(Word Count: 956)
I began the new year with skin exposed to sheets of rain
and trust exposed to the elements—an apprenticeship to vulnerability.
A break up, a break out, a break down, a break in.
I suspected a master craftsman lived within me, soothing a tenderfoot’s tender heart, pierced with perceived ruin. One of those end-of-the-world moments. It’s often the end of the world as we know it. And then...the new one.
I pitched a tent under a semi-shelter of long redwood limbs. The rain and tears came in buckets for days and nights without end. Then colors came back.
I was dry for the moment. But I found there’s no protection for my heart because there’s nothing to be protected from.
What did I know already that I didn’t want to know? That I was scared to know? At some point I knew my heart could hold it all and more. And much more. It’s a question I’ve asked myself many times since.
On day 3 My fear dissolved in the coming clouds, Knowing once again that water rolls through a parched land as tears fall as rain.
On day 4 and 5 my pain became a glorious lotus bloom.
I had forgotten—Love will always be bigger than fear—and then I remembered. And then forgot and then remembered—this is the dance.
It’s the same trust that sees even the darkest shadows radiate like a beacon signaling home. My own and others.
On day 6 I vowed to keep cracking—to meet the lightning bolts hidden on the magenta horizon as my long-lost best friend.
Oh how we missed each other.
On day 7 I walked back to town, to the beat of my heart. (-Ryan @ryanreturntotheearth)
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For #NaNoWriMo2018, we (Katie and Ryan @wildnatureheart) are each writing our memoirs, our Wild Nature Heart stories so-to-speak, sharing a glimpse of our progress throughout November. We really believe what the organization says: the world needs your story! Everyone has a story to tell—What's your Wild Nature Heart? We look forward to sharing this journey of vulnerability and self-discovery.
Ryan and Katie
#mywildnatureheartstory
We are in a collective initiatory moment—May our hearts crack open and tears fall as rain. May the dams of our suppressed emotions bust open, so we may rejoin our true belonging with the more-than-human world. We grieve because we love. You can feel the movement. It is time now.
National Writing Month DAY 16:
STEPPING INTO THE IMPOSSIBLE
(Word Count: 1326)
I can’t really count the times I’ve stood at the base of a mountain and thought, “How in the hell am I going to do this?! It’s impossible.” And then I go forward anyway, step by step, sometimes with much pain, often with unexpected joys. And I somehow find myself at the top, overlooking the verdant valley I was once in, looking to the next stage of the journey, asking, “how in the hell did I do that?”
•
The answer of course is Step by step, sometimes hand over fist, sometimes face-planting with tears, but all the time, trust after trust.
This lesson has found its voice in many other circumstances. Yes I walked the entire range of the Sierra mountains, west to east and south to north, I’ve climbed hand over fist up out of a desert canyon, near death with exhaustion and dehydration, I’ve burrowed through dense forest and thorny vines and mud bogs, BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY I’ve met the big projects, I’ve dropped into that dark well of deep grief and the black holes, I’ve greeted the mystery of new connections, and I’ve struggled with that enigma, my own powers, and I used to tremble with doubt and fear and resisted each stage of the journey, but then something shifted and I finally learned—it’s the step by step, it’s the Big Trust, it’s the self-love, it’s the being done with self-abandonment, it’s the forward motion of my longing, my vulnerable mountain heart, my true belonging. (-Ryan @ryanreturntotheearth)
For #NaNoWriMo2018, we (Katie and Ryan @wildnatureheart) are each writing our memoirs, our Wild Nature Heart stories so-to-speak, sharing a glimpse of our progress throughout November. We really believe what the organization says: the world needs your story! Everyone has a story to tell—What's your Wild Nature Heart? We look forward to sharing this journey of vulnerability and self-discovery.
Ryan and Katie
#mywildnatureheartstory
